Naughty Guide To Buenos Aires
Buenos Aires is a real melting pot of vibrant clubs and seductive nightspots with a cosmopolitan clientele which guarantees any visitor an unforgettable stay.
Argentina's capital city is home to some of the world's most beautiful girls and gorgeous guys.
Prostitution is legal (although brothels aren't), and men can also enjoy a 'girlfriend experience,' where a luscious lady will be your companion for the duration of your stay.
Buenos Aires is also extremely gay-friendly, so the whole vibe here is really just very relaxed and party-focused.
Ideal for a short break or a longer stay, where you can really start mixing with the locals and exploring what makes this enormous and colorful city tick.
A safety tip - if you're a guy, be wary of women who target male tourists to charm them, drug them and then rob them, as with most major cities, it's all about common sense.
Trust your instincts. There are plenty of girls (and guys) who will gladly show you a good time without feeling the need to con you, just keep your wits about you.
So here's my pick of the naughtiest things to do during your stay in the city of 'Fair Winds.'
1. Drop by a 'Telo'
Telos are pay-by-the-hour hotels where you can spend a naughty night with a lover or escort.
They're not seedy, like the places you'd find in Amsterdam or other cities, they're properly-equipped rooms with all mod cons, including jacuzzis, room-side parking, safe sex menus and even pizza delivery.
You'll find all walks of life here, from married couples just wanting to add a bit of spice to the bedroom, to swingers, random hook-ups and straight paid-for sexual liaisons.
Argentines have such a laid-back, practical approach to sex, it's pretty much a case of 'anything goes,' mixed with a whole lot of convenience and efficiency.
Look for signs that say 'Auberge Transitorio' or 'Playa Privado' and do shop around before deciding which one best suits your needs.
Popular telos include the
in Flores, which has huge walk-in showers and luxury bedding; the
in Palermo, with raised jacuzzi and ceiling mirrors, and the
in Villa del Parque, which has gorgeous garden suites and even a rooftop sauna.
2. Give yourself a Tango-gasm
If there’s one thing Argentina is super-famous for, it’s the sexy Tango.
There are tons of Tango shows to check out while you’re here, all guaranteed to get you in the mood for sex.
One of the best is
where your ticket includes dinner, entertainment and the wonderful ambiance of a restored Art Deco former MGM theater.
It’s a stunning building, which only adds to the naughty air of decadence here.
You could also try
El Viejo Almacen,
which has been presenting authentic Tango shows since 1969.
Here, you’ll find a more traditional Tango show, but all the greatest - and sexiest - Tango stars have performed here, so it’s top of the list for authenticity.
But if you like your Tangos to get you screaming with desire, then you simply must try the
Sasha's Tangogasm Experience.
Tailored to a 3-day or 7-day itinerary, you’ll be taken under the wing of Sasha Cagen, who will introduce you to the Tango and immerse you in the 360-degree Buenos Aires Tango Experience.
Hook up with a ‘taxi dancer’ - your own personal tango teacher and companion, who will not only teach you to dance, but will also show you how to shed those inhibitions and be sensual and tactile and completely open and relaxed.
You’ll visit famous Tango bars, indulge in some sensational food and drink, make tons of new friends and even go on a Tango shoe shopping spree.
3. Feed Your Lust
Buenos Aires has some truly amazing restaurants where you can chow down on aphrodisiacs and cocktails and sample some of the best cuisine on the planet.
is one of the most romantic restaurants in town - try the 18-course Chef’s Menu which contains plenty of small treats you can hand-feed to your lover, with wine pairings to enhance that air of decadence.
If you’re a sushi lover, check out the sophisticated environs of
situated in the upmarket Belgrano district, offering high class Peruvian sushi, served against a backdrop of leather banquettes, sparkling glass and warm, rustic brick walls.
4. Get Dragged-up
Buenos Aires is very gay-friendly so you’ll be spoiled for choice when it comes to drag shows and LGBT entertainment.
One of the best times I had during my stay was the Sunday night drag show at
Sitges Bs As
There’s a great atmosphere with some fabulous drinks deals, and the club itself has a really naughty feel to it.
Snuggle into one of the white leather booths for cocktails and canapes, before letting it all hang out on the main floor as you’re entertained by some of Argentina’s foremost drag divas and burlesque acts.
5. Erotic Entertainment
If you like your nights to be super-spicy, then Buenos Aires offers more intense pleasure packages for fetishists by way of
a community of BDSMers who organize parties and events on a regular basis.
Simply sign up online with the dates when you’re in town, and they’ll get in touch with you to let you know of events happening in the city during your stay.
Whatever you’re into - electro-sex, dom/sub play, bondage etc - they will have something for you, and it’s a great way to expand your international BDSM friend network.
6. Awaken your senses
For a 100% erotic experience in Buenos Aires, you need to use all of your senses, not just some of them.
Check out the
Wide Night erotic
events held throughout the year.
It’s a mix of theater, photography, food, drink and storytelling which brings to life common erotic fantasies and allows guests to move through the story, heightening their senses and acting like a 2-hour session of foreplay.
By the time this interactive erotic exhibition and performance is over, you’ll be feeling so frisky, you’ll struggle not to jump on the first person you see.
Best experienced with a lover!
7. Get swinging
In a place as open-minded and cosmopolitan as Buenos Aires, the swinging scene is loud, proud and easy to find.
There are numerous swingers’ clubs in the city, the best of which are
which welcomes singles, couples and threesomes to its nightclub-style Saturday night parties;
which is a couples-focused club which does also cater for amorous singles who want to meet a tall, dark stranger in a safe environment, and is housed a very sophisticated, two-floor club in Palermo.
8. Sex it up with a stranger in a speakeasy
Conjuring up the vibe of old Buenos Aires, and the myriad sailors, tourists, lost souls and immigrants who have passed through this huge port, you’ll find dozens of old-style cellar and back room bars hidden away in the back of innocent-looking shops and storerooms.
There’s something really naughty about diving through a hidden door and emerging into a bustling, intimate, smoky bar full of strangers, all of whom have mysterious stories to tell.
I had a great evening in one such place, the
a tiny bar secreted away in the back of a florist’s shop.
It’s a real melting pot of personalities in here, so you can just sit up at the bar with a cheeky Limoncello and wait for someone to come and introduce themselves.
Who knows where the evening might lead?